SNAPSHOTS

A RANDOM MIX OF PHOTOS AND CHAT.

A Failure To Launch.

I have been absent for a very long time (my last post was penned July 10th). Here I sit, grappling with awkwardness, staring at my computer screen, and asking myself the question, how in the heck do I begin again? 

Yesterday my close friend Dorothy and I spent a couple of hours together with coffee and candid conversation. I don't think we left a topic untouched. Among them was the question of why I fell away from blogging. The obvious and easy answer is that life has been complex. I have a great deal of responsibility to people that I love, and my mom especially has needed extra attention.

There is nothing untrue about that answer. No one's life story is without unforeseen twists and turns in the plot. But life's surprises notwithstanding, we all experience busyness, obligations, chores, doctor appointments, British drama binges, and the rest. But there's more to this question of blog abandonment, and I would like to honestly explain. When I lose my momentum, which I most assuredly have, my spirited embrace of blogging is displaced by insecurity and blog lethargy. Proof of this is that I have posted to my blog only one time since January! I spent 3 weeks blogging my way through England, sharing photos and feelings, promising future posts, and then I abruptly stopped writing; for months and months.

I have a serious and strong desire to share bits and pieces of my life; my photos, my ideas, and our dreams. And though absent from the blogosphere, we were not idle. As Larry and I chip away at our project list, I envision every new creative undertaking as a potential blog post. I string together the words in my head, I clearly visualize the photos. But repeatedly I have sold out to that small ubiquitous voice that constantly whispers, "What makes you think anyone is interested?". 

Dorothy said I worry obsessively about being perfect. She's right. I am convinced that no one is interested in anything less. I have a bin full of projects that are 80% finished. So she said I need to understand that if I want to move forward I have to learn that although I will never be perfect, I can be perfect enough. I really like that~ perfect enough.

You know, maybe no one is actually interested. Well, Larry and Dorothy are interested. But what matters is that I truly enjoy the blogging process. It provides the structure I desperately need and a challenge. My blog is a photo journal of my adventure through life, and I love creating it. However, I get easily derailed because I allow blogging to become a popularity contest; like sorority rush. Silly, right? It's my blog and it only needs to make me happy. In other words, it's my party and I'll blog if I want to.

Perhaps you're wondering what, if anything, I have concluded from all of this babble? Just this~ Blogging is a not about being the best, but rather about sharing my best. Creativity has no well-defined destination. It's an adventure; it's a process. It's a lesson in perfect enough. 

Adventure indeed awaits. And I hope you'll wander with me.

Thanks for allowing me to ramble,

~Dana